At the lighting of the plaza- KCMO

Vacation starts at the bitch river grill

Whoops, birch river grill

Having fun at dog park

Live from our lives in ten years

In ten years...

We are at our town's chili cookofff. Beer. Chili in styrofoam. Face painting & pony rides. A band of 50 somethings. 

We have found our people, but in like ten years. 

Where is the 30something version?

Ugly purse at work

So, it is hard to really see the cheap plastic and crazy blue color of
this purse in this picture, but believe me UGLY!

You know you are old...

When you are getting ready to go out on a Saturday night and you are
listening to Prairie Home Companion.

Wine coolers and scrapbooking

How can you resist the combination?

I am flying to mineeapolis!!

It is fun to be a spelling scout

cyclical

Why do we become obsessed with vampires every decade or so?

sir, you are killing me.

I didn't think it could get worse.

But it just did. (please note that I am at least 6 yards from this girl)

 

The girl:

“when we get back you are going to be so hard – my boyfriend, I was staying in his parents hotel room, we went into the bathroom, well we didn’t have sex, I wouldn’t let him have sex, but let’s say I helped him out”

“we had sex like every day for the 20 or so days he was back, like twice a day sometimes. That is why I was afraid when I took that pregnancy test. I took one like five days ago, but that was just a warm up, this one was the real one”

“I was like, you wouldn’t have to throw me down the stairs, I would jump. I ain’t not ready to have no babies”

 

Finally, she said something I agreed with.

airport fun

So, today in the airport, I got to sit next to 6 “army” recruits on their way to basic training. I put army in quotes b/c I think the Army would be ashamed of these idiots. Also, the one girl should immediately be reprimanded and sent to do 100 pushups. She was obnoxious and discussed the following:

1)       “I hope they have some pretty girls, I mean I am not a lesbian, but I don’t like ugly girls, I mean like butch girls. I dated a girl in high school” – which then launched the obnoxious boys in a discussion about carpet eating.

2)      “okay mister married, you can’t check out hot girls so shut up”

3)      With her mouth open and chewing McDonalds French fries audibly (I simply couldn’t look at her any more) “how come we don’t get to be part of a battalion” – some guy says “because you are part of the transportation company” and she says (so intelligently) “that sounds homo”

4)      “I am going to drive the shit out of that truck”

5)      “Okay, I could throw up now”

6)      “Hey come here” – the guy leans over – she belches in his ear.

 

I am thinking about moving.

 

 

I'm back

I am post-vacation. I feel serene and calm. even though I am at work! good for me.

Mwwsmmtam

vacation countdown

dude. seriously only 2 more days here in the office and 5 in Dayton.
ah, I heart you vacation.

Vacation - the hardships

Vacation (particularly one over a week long, out of the country and with a big group of friends) is hard.
1) hard to plan - I have spent quite a bit of my personal time reviewing every apartment for rent in Barcelona's Gothic District, Born and Ravel areas - comparing for number of bedrooms, bathrooms, beds, and location. - I also been blessed with some sort of sixth sense of apartments that someone else is simultaneously booking and cursed with a delay of a couple minutes so I always seem to lose this race.
2) hard to coordinate - I have been thinking about all the people coming, going, dates, boats, ferries, flights and checkin/checkout times and despite the best efforts in google docs I am still a bit confused. plus, let's be honest, the entire point of other countries' timetables is a general best guess and they never really abide by them... why am I so stressed out about it, what will be will be.
3) hard to prep for - do I have to tell you how many hours I spent picking out new swimsuits on-line. jeez. and then I had to send many of them back. one because the leg holes were too small. is that a thing? I didn't think so before, but now I will check for leg hole dimensions.
4) hard to not already be gone - I have 8 more days in the office and then 5 more days at a customer site before I leave. but honestly, I have done such a good job of setting up backups for the 6 weeks I will be out that I could already be gone. but I am not. I am fighting to keep engaged and keep finishing stuff up. I want a task list of ZERO items when I leave. that is hard and a little ridiculous, but hey, even if I have to declare task list bankrupcy I am ready.

and then there is the fear of the vacation actually being over. I am so worried that it is going to be over too quickly... I don't want it to be over!

how to know you are doing some work you don't want to do...

You check your email and read the entire IPASS newsletter email. Oh my.

love and hate: an essay about my job

I was really going to write an essay about my day and how I both love and hate my job...
but you know what? Fuck it.
I would rather go home and take my dogs to the dogpark.

garraaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrr

another 30 minutes of my life gone

I don't want to say that I just wasted half an hour, but besides this picture I don't have much to show for it. gnnrr.

New hotel

If you know me, you know my favorite hotel in Dayton is the Marriott. Some people like that new Courtyard across the river, but I just don't think you can beat the Marriott for it's people.
But, something happened when I submitted this trip request... the Marriott was booked up. Even for me, one of their top 50 travelers in 2008!
But, okay, let's do the Courtyard.
Gasp! Booked too.
WTF, right?

Anyhow, my third choice is a Doubletree in downtown. I have heard from some of the consultants that it is great. Okay, let's give it a try, I haven't stayed there before.

I just got here. The room looks nice as I walk in. and, ooo, a Wolfgang Puck coffeemaker with a fancy dual spouty thing and the coffee ground pods... oh Doubletree, you are winning me over.
then, I open this little door and what? why is the toilet nearly touching the sink?

Oddest song to hear twice today: release me by Wilson Phillips

meh

I have taken to keeping a graph in my office of my happiness/rage status throughout the week.
this graph is nice, but it also shows me that I have some serious fluctuations in emotion throughout the work day.
one day:
starts high in happiness because I have a plan for the day, some open time to get stuff done
swift decent to fury as I read an email from a buffoon who asks a stupid question
rise back up to elation as I create a fabulous spreadsheet
smiles and happiness as I talk to my favorite customer and she does everything I suggest
rage when I re-read that email above
frustration with myself for not sending that email to another location and having too many emails in my inbox and never getting them done
anger that it is now the end of the day and I have three things that I didn't get done
some happiness that I say screw it and just leave work.


PS - I had a wacky dream last night... I dreamt that I was talking to Bea Arthur (right... like why her???) and she said, I lost all of my money. I only have 150 dollars left to my name, and that is just enough to go to Patrick Henry's.
I didn't know what Patrick Henry's was. But then I found out (in the dream) that it was a euthanasia hospital where they killed you with lethal injection (and then I spotted someone being brain scrambled through their nose, that wasn't really consistent with the lethal injection, so I was confused when I woke up about that) and then you had also bought a coffin. I remember seeing a sign with the prices - Euthanasia - 80.00, Coffin 50.00

thoughts on this:
1) Bea Arthur?
2) why did my brain name the hospital for a Revolutionary War hero?
3) no taxes at the euthanasia hospital
4) so, perhaps you can order off the menu and get a lobotomy at Patrick Henry's Euthansia Hospital?

am I insane?

oh! another happily just walked into the room!

Yeaaaa for Workstation Steve!

 

He smiles at me a lot and makes me feel squishy inside.

If we ever end up in a bar intoxicated together I can’t be responsible for what happens.

you missed this game

Everyone’s favorite boring meeting game – who would you sleep with?

 

Today

Total in room: 7

Would: 5

Happily: 2

 

I haven't seen Whitney in a long time

I haven't seen Whitney in a long time. I realized this when I saw today's lunch menu and thought of him.

I had the Philadelphia pepper pot soup today and it was delicious. not terribly spicy, but complex. just as I expected.

Some sort of training

Airline gate agents must receive some sort of training that when
things aren't going right: never answer any questions. None. Don't
even acknowledge a question was asked. No slowing, no short pause like
any human would do. No!

They must drill them in airline agent school. It would take an awful
lot of reinforcement to get such consistent behavior.

After the ignore all questions course, they must embark on intense
constant, rhythmic typing for at least six hours a day.

plane happenings

1) it isn't auspicious to be watching breaking news about a plane being downed in the Hudson River as you get ready to board your flight.
2) There are highs and lows when flying:
- the high of boarding the final leg home - on time! going to get home before midnight!
- the low of realizing your seat is right next to the lavatory
- the high of realizing that there are only three open seats on the plane, and one is next to you!
- the low of hearing that they need two volunteers to move to the back of the plane
- the high of having those volunteers pick the other two open seats!
- the low of hearing the pilot say that they still need one more person to move to the back of the plane.

sigh.

Stoplight efficiency

Long stoplight are now fun! Sent at PD and Verona Rd intersection

Sent from my iPhone

iPhone

The iPhone has already cost me at least two hours today. But, oh, the
joy!

Sent from my iPhone